On an (un)successful attempt to find oneself as a researcher-practitioner―reflections from the field of practice

This is a self-reflexive text that relates to the considerations on the difficulties/paradoxes that I faced when I started the process of self-analysis in the action research stream. The aim of the action research was studying myself as family assistant in the daily practice environment. It was a biographical period in my research life in which I found myself in the dual role of the practitioner, and also a practicing researcher. The article presents the difficulties in the research process, which made it impossible for me to realize myself as researcher practitioner. I built my considerations on the basis of a conception of a man capable of action (homme capable) coined by Paul Ricoeur. It relates to the work area on the identity, which proved to be crucial in the process of self-analysis. The text discusses the epistemological position of a participating researcher. In my view, the epistemological position of the researcher is dependent on the adopted research-action concept. The concept of research “in” the action or investigation “by” action designs different epistemological planes of researcher’s participation in the studied reality.